Throughout my journey with Mental Health there are a few things I’m that I am feeling.
The first being overwhelmed by the level of support and love I receive from my family on a day-to-day basis.
The second is the feeling of being let down by the Mental Health team throughout and the battle just to get some sort of care or support.
From the start its a big step to admit that you need help and to get that help is a long and lengthy process from getting and appointment to getting a diagnosis.
At the beginning I went to every appointment, took all the medication and followed every task I was given to start my journey to getting better.
Through the first year I was passed from pillar to post, from person to person and department to department where I was being turned away from every door.
Then it happened I had my first melt down!
I was in the house and thought I heard my name called and just lost the plot all together.
I was lost and scared, the tears wouldn’t stop and I refused to go back into the house.
This would last for hours but luckily for me Cheryl was there to help me through it the whole way and called the crisis team for help.
After a lengthy conversation and advice it was only then did we find out what my diagnosis was of Personality Disorder but it came from them not my own doctor and the reason why??
In his own words he thought he told me!
I heard nothing for a few months until I called the team myself to see what was going on to be informed that my doctor had left and I was under someone else now and that they would be in touch very soon.
I meet the new doctor and the first thing he does is up my medication and add a few new ones, run a few tests and book an appointment to be assessed.
I leave feeling positive this could be the start of me getting better.
Little did I know how bad this doctor would be for me.
I attend every meeting like always and every other meeting is met with my medication being up which is now just basically sedating me.
He asks me why I’m on the medication because he doesn’t remember prescribing it for me!
It’s now been a year waiting for the tests and referral at this point to which he asks what they were for but its ok because he will up my medication if I need it.
And as for the advice he gives me goes as good as this…
“If you were to hurt someone even kill them you would be cover by the mental health act”
Tell me what kind of advice is that??
Again time goes by and I receive no appointments no phone calls and the time came that I was dreading the most and wished it would never come to that.
Being sectioned for my own safety and the safety of others.
I spent a short while in a hospital in Stafford where I was taken care of and treated properly, re medicated and when the time for me to leave came I was assured that there was care in place from my team.
I left and waited but nothing came again.
I call to find out whats going on and oh yeah my doctor had left again and I was assigned a new doctor.
This doctor I never got to see my appointments were cancelled days before then she was on holiday and oh yeah she left!!
So where am I now?
I m left with a new doctor that Cheryl had to fight and scream for me to see because they just wouldn’t seal with me or kept fobbing me off.
When it comes to the point that your own mental health team are asking you to make a complaint to PALS then you know that they are in desperate need.
I don’t know where I go from here, I know I don’t want to be locked up again so all I can do is hope they sort themselves out and just start getting better.