Father – DNA doesn’t make you dad

If you look in the dictionary the word Father means a male parent.

Anyone can make a child you just light some candles and put on some mood music…so I’m told anyway.

Just because you contributed some DNA doesn’t mean you are a Father, that right is earned by love, attention and reliability.

I met 3 kids a while ago who had the most amazing mommy, she did everything by herself she was both parents in one. She kept them safe, showered them with love and gave them the earth and more. These 3 children were so well-mannered and behaved that you wouldn’t believe this mother did it all without a cape or any superpowers.

Unfortunately the dad wasn’t around much and slowly disappeared form the scene it’s a sad story but true.

I have looked after these children for 6 years now and it was a long process from being the guy who was just around every once in a while to the guy that lived there. Over time I started to gain these little people’s trust but there was still battles to go through.

Patience and time was the key, spending time to get to know them individually.

Harry the eldest was very stand offish, very timid, you couldn’t say boo to this boy without him crying so I had to be calm and softer with him than I usually am which was difficult since I’m used to rough housing from kickboxing and MMA so to meet a boy as vulnerable as Harry was an experience, I learnt patience from him.

Ellie Jayne was very shy at first but settled well she was funny and clever. She was such a daddies girl when I met her so she had no time for other male role models in her life but sadly she was being let down and eventually she would open up and I would listen to her problems and was soon aware of how diplomatic she was, she would make a great Prime Minister some day. I learnt to listen from Ellie

Annabelle was a beautiful, giggly, outgoing, so so clever and was just learning the ways of the world. I had the privilege of helping her learn new things, doing homework, helping her with gaining her confidence. I was there for her first day at school and even our battle of wills over eating a fish finger which she won by the way by falling asleep at the table. We soon bonded quickly. I learnt to love and want kids from bonding with Annabelle.

father like daughter
Father like daughter

Over the years I cleaned up sick, looked after them when they were poorly, held them when they were sad, joined them in their high points, watched them go to new schools and taking them on holidays for family memories.

They got to the point when they sat me down and asked if they could take my name, wow I never imagined that in a million years. I asked if they were sure about this and they all in agreed saying they were 100% sure. So the paperwork was filled in and signed and we are in the process of getting in done.

From no children to 5 children, from never wanting kids to meeting 3 children and wanting more kids. These 3 have changed my life completely and I look forward to watching them grow up and being a granddad.

So you don’t need DNA to be a dad or parent, what you need in time and love. That makes you a true father.

Daddy Giraffe x

 

 

 

 

 

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